BOOTY CAMP by Debra Anastasia

 

13886277_1476207975738744_3974776369545592927_nCheck out Lauren Rosa from CherryRed’s Reads
GRELP review of Booty Camp Dating Service! Booty Camp Dating Service is 110% guaranteed to find you the love of your life! How can you pass that up? Men can pack an engagement ring and ladies can bring bridal magazines to the first date. We’re that sure!

And in the bedroom? Your Booty Camp Dating Service match will turn your fantasy into your everyday reality! Want to learn more about this fantastic dating service?

Stay tuned from more parody reviews from your favorite authors, readers and bloggers as we get closer to release day! (8/28/16)

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Read all about it on August 28th, 2016 in the hilarious new book by #1 Amazon Humor Bestselling author Debra Anastasia.

Here are the links:

Pre-order Bootie Camp on iTunes here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1131251158

Sign up here for release notification for all other platforms (Amazon, B&N, etc): http://goo.gl/forms/OgNOAkhuF0ptp7Wi2

Add to goodreads here: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30642708-bootie-camp

Website: http://www.debraanastasia.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/debra.anastasia

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/debra_anastasia/

Amazon: http://amzn.to/2ahrOg2

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Debra_Anastasia

Debra’s Gang: https://www.facebook.com/groups/528174067251908/

(****Booty Camp is NOT a real company! But the book is as real as the humor of one of my favorite all time authors, Debra Anastasia!*****)

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TEMPTING JO, Cover Reveal!

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Forbidden love is hell…

Confident and quirky, Jo Sanford thinks her boss is God’s gift to women–and she couldn’t be further from the truth. Devilishly handsome, Luc DeVille will stop at nothing to lure his administrative assistant right into his arms–and bed.

Over Rafe Goodman’s dead body…

Rafe, Jo’s best friend, refuses to sit by and watch as Luc tries to win the heart of the woman he’s always protected. After all, Rafe is her guardian angel. Suddenly, Jo’s caught in the middle of a battle between good and evil. But the closer she gets to the fire, the hotter it burns. Now, Jo’s going to learn that when love battles lust, Heaven and Hell collide.

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EXCERPT:

“Honey, this is all about you, and I’m worried. This guy is out of your league.”

“I knew it. You don’t think I’m good enough for him!” She grabs several outfits and marches to the dressing room.

I run in after her, causing a pandemonium of outraged screeching. This must be how dogs feel with those high-pitched whistles. One woman smacks me with a hanger as I run past her.

“You’re wrong, Jo. Like I told you, I think you’re much too good for him.”

Jo turns and her mouth drops open. “Get out! You can’t be in here.”

I push her into one of the dressing rooms and bolt the door behind us. She holds the clothes to her chest.

“He doesn’t deserve you.”

She swallows. “Th-Thank you. But again, I can handle this.”

Someone pounds on the door. “Sir, you need to leave,” an authoritative female voice commands.

Madge said I needed to break the rules. I’m off to a good start. Might as well finish with a bang. I grab Jo and stare into her eyes. I want to kiss some sense into her. Not that I have much sense to impart at the moment. My thoughts scramble as I gaze at her tempting mouth.

“Rafe—”

The pounding on the door intensifies. “Sir, security is on the way!”

Finally, I dig deep and find enough will power to take a step back. Or maybe I just wimp out. At this point I have no idea of the right thing to do.

“You’re incongruous,” Jo whispers breathlessly.

“Incongruous?”

She nods. “You know, bad beyond correction.”

I chuckle. “I think you mean incorrigible.” Though I feel a little incongruous as well…

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Enter the GIVEAWAY!

Tempting Jo will be available 9/15/16. This beautiful cover was designed by Coreen Montagna. You can add it to your To Be Read List on Goodreads.

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You can find me here:

Website: www.nanceecain.com/

Blog: nanceecain.wordpress.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/NanceeCainAuthor/

FB Street team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Cain.Raisers/

Twitter: www.twitter.com/Nancee_Cain

Pinterest: www.pinterest.com/nanceecain/

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/Nancee_Cain

Instagram: @nanceecain

Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/bhFwvD

Amazon: amazon.com/author/nanceecain

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A Walk Further into the Woods with Hans & Greta #ComedyBookWeek.

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Welcome to #ComedyBookWeek, an annual, online celebration of humor in writing. Today I’m hosting one of my favorite authors, Nicki Elson, and her twisted fairy tale, HANS & GRETA. Yesterday at Feather Stone’s Romance Under Fire blog, Nicki took you by the hand and lead you into the forest with Hans and Liesel (bet ya thought I was gonna say Greta, huh?). Today she pulls you further in—if you dare…


Excerpt from HANS & GRETA by Nicki Elson

“Liesel! Darling!” Hans called into the trees a full hour later. He’d lagged too far behind and had caught nary a sign of her.

“It actually sounds as if you care.” Her sardonic voice had come from above.

Snapping his gaze skyward, he peered through the murky night and saw her perched on a high branch. “How in the hell did you get all the way up there?”

“I’m not sure, actually. Adrenalin, I guess.” She scanned the ground.

“You have no idea how to get down, do you?”

“It’s not that far. If you just stand right there.” She pointed directly below the tree.

“And catch you? I appreciate your confidence in my brute strength, but no matter how narrow your waistline, you’re not exactly a tiny little kitty ca—” His sentence was cut short by his own scream when the spiky tip of her high heel caught him in the forehead.

“What’s wrong, sweetums?” Liesel cooed with false innocence. “I was only trying to make myself lighter. Ready for the other one?”

He scowled at the threat but recollected himself. “For your own safety, I suppose you better drop it—gently—to the ground. Then you can use your feet for traction on the trunk. I’ll stand just underneath in case you slip.”

“My hero,” she drawled. Swinging her legs over the branch and around the trunk, she slowly inched her way down.

Hans stood dutifully below, holding his arms at the ready. When she was still several feet from the ground, a loud crack of snapping wood echoed through the forest, and she dropped onto him. The force knocked him off balance and they toppled to the ground in an awkward heap, his back slamming into the unyielding forest floor.

Liesel erupted with hysterical laughter while he held still, attempting to assess the impact of the fall on his spine. She spun around on top of him and kissed the tip of his nose. “That’s what you get for being such a wretched tease.” Sitting with her rump firmly planted on his chest, she opened her mouth wide in a yawn. “Enough fun for the night. Take me home.”

Determining that a few bruises were the extent of the damage, Hans slid his hands under his girlfriend and gently scootched her bottom to the forest floor. “About that,” he said, rising to stand and peering into the black night. “You took me on so many twists and turns, I have no idea where we are, and without the sun, I have no way to determine direction.”

“What are you saying?” Liesel asked. Any hint of mirth had drained from her voice. “Tell me you’re not suggesting we sleep here!”

“Do you have any other ideas?”

“How about we head back the way we came?” Picking up her shoes, she stepped off in a direction Hans was pretty sure was incorrect, but since he really had no idea, he followed her lead. Walking all night would at least be better than fighting off her advances until dawn.

Walk all night they did, with Liesel bitching through much of it while Hans bit his tongue. As the night drew on, she quieted, exhausted, and agreed to take a break. Hans sat with his back against a thick tree trunk and guided her to curl into his chest with his arms wrapped around her for a blanket. She fell asleep immediately and he soon followed. When they awoke, pale pink light showed through the branches. Hans noticed that the forest was much brighter just ahead, so he helped Liesel to her feet and grasped her hand, leading her to an illuminated clearing.

“How utterly charming,” she murmured in a voice that sounded like it was still dreaming.

Hans couldn’t disagree. Before them lay a hilly expanse carpeted with bright green grass. Butterflies dipped and scurried among the patches of blooms randomly scattered about, and even the fat bumblebees looked friendly. A small chicken coop stood aside a flourishing garden in one corner of the yard, and a darling cottage was plopped in the center of the meadow. Everything about the house was delightful, from its thatched roof to the cobblestone path leading up to it.

Liesel ambled forward. “I’d swear it’s made of gingerbread.”

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HANS & GRETA is available at Amazon

Free to read in Kindle Unlimited, and only .99 to purchase!

Learn more about Nicki’s books at nickielson.com

Leave a comment for a chance to win a Kindle copy of HANS & GRETA!

Cover Reveal! S.M. Lumetta’s YOU ARE HERE

I am thrilled to be part of this cover reveal! S.M. Lumetta is more than a talented writer and friend. She’s also a fantastic graphic artist. She designed my logo for my author page and social media and has done many book covers. I think this may be her best work yet. Look at this gorgeous cover of her exciting new novel, You Are Here.

businessman working on laptop  in black suitBLURB:

Lucie Gideon wakes up in a hospital, alone. Her family is dead and her home is gone, but she can’t remember a thing. She soon discovers, however, she can glimpse the future, and everything she sees seems to revolve around a mysterious man she’s never met.

Greyson Ellicott hasn’t been a part of normal society in a decade. As a contract killer, he’s learned to deaden himself so he doesn’t have to think or feel for anything or anyone. His carefully buried memory cracks open and reminds him of what he left behind.

When Lucie and Greyson meet head-on, destinies collide. Grey doesn’t want to care about—let alone fall in love with—the crazy girl who has visions of him, but she’s in the crosshairs of a murderer and he may be the only one who can save her.

Releases August 29th, 2016

PRE-ORDER LINKS
iBooks: http://apple.co/29xSMRh
Kobo: http://bit.ly/29xY1h1
Nook: coming soon
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S.M. Lumetta is also a contributing author to the ground breaking novel:
Felony Ever After —A DOMINO Anthology: 13 Authors ONE story
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Verity Michaels is new to New York City, but even she knows riding in a stolen cab is not a normal way to meet someone. Damn it if that tattoo-covered would-be felon isn’t everywhere now, and lighting everything on fire under her skirt.

His name is Hudson Fenn, and he’s frustratingly impossible to pin down. He works as a bike messenger, but has the manners of a prince—along with a strange tendency toward breaking and entering. As much as Verity knows he’s not her type, and likely to land her in jail, she can’t help but find her truest self when they’re together.

Can she be brave enough to give Hudson a real chance? Will he be bold enough to reveal the man beneath the ink, or will his secrecy doom their connection? Also, WTF is the deal with Verity’s boss? No less than thirteen of your favorite romance writers have teamed up to tell this sexy, wacky, snort-inducing tale. With them you’ll visit the world’s most irritating office, a VIP room of questionable cleanliness, and the fanciest apartment a bike messenger has ever inhabited, but you’ll still never see this ending coming.

To learn more about S.M. Lumetta, you can find her here:

http://www.smlumetta.com

https://www.facebook.com/SMLumetta/

https://www.instagram.com/smlumetta/https://twitter.com/smlumetta

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